Addicted?

Lately I've had a lot of people asking me, "So are you addicted now?" My response always comes out as a hedge, something along the lines of, "Ah, um, I don't know. I don't think so."

Growing up in the "Just Say No" 80s, the word addiction instantly conjures images filled with vials of crack cocaine (if they even come in vials) , needles, and strung out people writhing on the ground of burned out factory buildings. Clearly my American youth was filled with after-school specials and made for TV movies.

But how could I possibly be addicted to running? The first time I answered the question, "Are you a runner?"in the affirmative was last week in my office building elevator when someone spotted me with a Raidlight backpack. How do you go from existential hesitation before a simple question to full-fledged addiction?

That would seem a bit much to me.

So I decided to check out the warning signs of addiction:

1. Usage increase- well i'm now running 4-5 times a week

2. Change in personality

3. Social withdrawl- i definitely don't go out like i used to

4. Ongoing use- first thing I did when I got to Shanghai was to go for a run.

5. Time spent obtaining the drug- i spent hours planning runs and looking for new gear.

6. Change in Daily Habits or appearance- my schedule has changed and hopefully I look a little different.

7. Neglects responsibilities- i definitely would rather run than do dishes.

8. Increased sensitivity- i get super grumpy if I haven't had a satisfying run.

9. Blackouts and forgetfulness

10. Defensiveness

I' m over 50% on the warning signs.

Uhoh...It's true- running does make me feel better and helps me cope with challenging emotional situations. After a long day at work, I wake up craving the solititude, the movement, the free space in my head, and the endorphins which pump through my body. My lifestyle is altered ; my priorities are rearranged; my approach to everything from friends to work to food is different.

But for now I'll stick to enthusastic, excited, or exhilarated about, by, or from running rather than addicted to it. I'd like to think that I'm still in control.

**Addiction is a very serious condition, and addiction to drugs, alcohol, prescriptions, gambling, and the internet are all harmful to you and your loved ones. If you need help, seek out the support of professionals who are qualified to assist. I am happy to help in indentifying the appropriate resources if you need someone to help you navigate.

Of course, if you're just having a lousy day, you are always welcome to run with me.